Give A Smile, Get A Smile

I write so no one will forget me. If people look back when I am gone they will see, that I had just one enemy. My mind. I want people to realize there was something they could do. I want them to look for it in the future and help those in need and those in pain. Because whether anyone believes it or not, people may think someone wants to take their own life but they are too afraid to confront them. That friend who is always your shoulder may need some help. If they never open up something may be wrong. Help them, even if it is out of your way. Though you may not believe it, everyone is hiding something that brings them pain. So when I am gone, see if the way my insanity ate me, is the way it is eating someone you know. It may not always be obvious. Hang in there.

Patterns

Those days everything is fine
Those days life is falling apart
They follow each other, come hand in hand
And make my mind, buzz with wonder
One day I am ready to leave, end it, while I still can
The next I am finding something, someone to live for
Again, I will give up and give in to the pain
No matter what, I always know, there is a hurt inside my soul
It never vanquishes, never vanishes
It is my only childhood friend
I have known it for so long, it has become normal
To give in has become habitual
I have no will to go on, because I feel I don't belong
What am I to do?
I have no clue, where this black hole has come from
But it will not leave and it's slowly eating away at me
Sanity let me be, so long ago
I have no one to turn to
The only thing that has never left me
Is this pattern
Of hurt that will not let me be

Years Passing

She sits in a field of worry
Wondering and hoping they haven't found her, for she is tired of running
Worn down by the years, now so weak and pale
A fear to sleep for she may see him
A want to be free
The breeze ruffles around her
She is fully aware of the man standing over her
Years have changed and shaped him so
A lifetime since they have last spoken
An anger flows though his veins
Seconds have passed that feel like an eternity
Her soul is long gone, and her limp lifeless body lay still

He stands over her covered in a warm, fresh crimson proof

He sheds one tear for that is all her worth
Now, she must face her fear of the nightmare
The future she'd been dreading since she left
A future undeniable
She got what she needed
He got what he wanted
To him she was dead
But only she knew she was free

Of the guilt of that one summers day

When she was forced to flee